Do you ever scroll through social media and think, “Man, everyone is doing so much better than I am”? Smiling faces, visiting cool places, doing fun things. Meanwhile, you feel stuck, spinning your wheels at a job you hate, or feel trapped in, or outgrew years ago. Or maybe you don’t even have a job right now. In many ways, men are struggling more than in the past. This report from the World Bank shows that the general labor force participation rate for men 15 – 64 has been declining steadily since the 1990s, going from 85% to 78% in North America. While there are hotly debated structural issues contributing to this trend, they are, frankly, irrelevant when it comes to you. Why? Because you are the only thing stopping you from achieving the career success you want. Figure this out quickly so you can move onto other issues, why? if you want a girl you need a job.
In this post, we’ll go through seven steps to create a fulfilling career to help you attain the future you’ve always wanted, or maybe you didn’t know you wanted. The Alpha IQ mantra starts with developing your Personal Power. Achieving this status requires you to be stable, not necessarily successful. Having and Alpha IQ means you’re continually conducting a SWOT analysis on your life in search of useful strategies to help you succeed. Take a look at these recommendations;
1. Forget the Facebook FOMO
Stop comparing yourself to others! It’s the worst thing you can do for two reasons. First, consider the fundamental nature of self-esteem. There will always be someone who has more than you in some way or another. Warren Buffett has more money than you, but he could easily choose to be envious of your youth unless you also happen to be an octogenarian. It’s a profoundly insecure habit to continually tally who has more than you, and it creates more insecurity and resentment. The second reason is more straightforward: most people probably feel the same way as you and are unsatisfied with their job or life path, or some combination of the two. Many “successful” people making tons of money and hate their jobs. Accepting where you are, without judgment, and planning a path forward, step-by-step is the only way you’ll actually get anywhere in life. You can’t change the past, but you can change the future.
2. Find out what you REALLY value
This is the hardest step, by far, because it means deep introspection about how you feel and what makes you happy. Maybe you already know this part, in which case, you’ve got a considerable head start. Think back to your previous jobs and think about the roles you liked. Write that down. Think about the parts you hated. Write those down. Those will help you avoid specific jobs. Usually, the opposite of those things you hate is something you value. You can also take an online assessment, like this one here. There are also paid ones out there which too, that may be worth it if you can glean actionable insights from them.
3. Find out what you’re good at and learn how to talk about it
You need to know your strengths, and you need to be able to talk about them. It is a good idea to test what you believe to be your strengths with your network. You never know how you look through other people’s eyes. Be brave and send an email to 10 people you trust of varying closeness. Make sure to include people you’ve worked with before. Tell them you’re working on creating a career path forward, and you’d really appreciate their feedback. Ask for their opinion about five strengths they have noticed about you. Your abilities can be in the soft-skills or hard skills territory. A soft-skill is something like “interpersonal” and “strategic,” you are good with people, and you can plan out strategies. These skills are transferable. A hard-skill is something like welding or Javascript. Less transferrable. Be extra brave and ask them for one thing you could really work on to make you stronger. The truth can hurt, so you can’t get pissed if they say something that upsets you. Take the lesson. They did you a favor. After that, take note of any strengths that were repeatedly mentioned. It’s a good chance that you’re actually really good at these things.
4. Create a path and believe in it
Start thinking about jobs or careers that fit your values and strengths. Create an overarching goal and then subgoals towards achieving that goal. For example, if your goal is to become a creative director of an ad firm, but you’re fresh out of school, you’ll need a sub-goal of getting ad industry experience, and likely looking at an entry-level position like an internship. Or maybe you’re now looking at starting your own business? You’ll need to create a business plan, secure capital, and create an online presence. If you’re not a tech guru, it’s probably best to leave that to professionals to make it look good and run without problems. The important part is that you make your own path and honestly believe it’s possible.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fqch5OrUPvA
5. Make yourself accountable
It’s so easy to let goals slip by and languish, especially if you fall back into old habits or get “busy” with other things, like your current shitty job. That’s why you need to make yourself accountable to someone other than you. Set deadlines and tangible milestones. Choose a friend or family member and tell them, “By [time] I will have done [goal].” Tell them to give you friendly reminders, or ask them to ask you about your progress. Or you can post online, as a sort of crowdsourced accountability – something we will work to facilitate here at the Alpha IQ learning portal. Creating milestones should be done for each step along the way. If you need to apply for higher education, for example, tell your “accountability buddy” here on the platform, “two days before the deadline. Let him know that you will have applied to three colleges.” That way, you’re less likely to let things slip by the wayside, making a liar out of yourself to someone you care about and/or respect.
6. Leverage your network
You likely know someone who knows someone who can be helpful to you. If you’re interested in, say, a job in aerospace, ask around, ‘Hey, do you know anyone who works in aerospace?’ If a friend or a relative does, ask them to connect you because you’d like to meet them for a 20-minute coffee just to chat about getting a career. People want to feel important. They will almost certainly say yes. Be on time. Be respectful of the person’s time. They are doing YOU a favor. Remember that and act accordingly. Go into your coffee date, ready to ask questions about the industry. Be present, professional, and friendly. Make eye contact and, most importantly, listen.
There is no wasted energy or effort. Making a professional connection means that initial connection will have even more contacts at their disposal for you to make further connections with.
If you are meeting with someone in an industry where you have the experience, and could feasibly work, bring a resume, but don’t ask for a job. Just ask about potentially working in their industry or company and how they got to where they are. Be ready to talk about your qualifications and experience if you are given the opportunity. If they say, ‘Hey, we’re hiring’ you have a CV ready to go, and if you have made a good impression, they will put in a good word for you.
7. F*cking do it!
The most important part is getting started. The hardest part is knowing what you want. Thanks to technology, there are millions of businesses, thousands of careers, and new ways of doing things that weren’t around even ten years ago. The hardest part is getting started. Know yourself and know that you have something to offer the world. The motto “fucking do it” isn’t me, or your parents or your high school guidance counselor saying that it’s YOU saying it. Because you know, deep down, that if you don’t fucking do it, you’ll end up getting fucked. You’ve tried in action, and unsurprisingly, it didn’t work. Being Alpha means taking responsibility for your life, being active in pursuing your goals, and making the future you want. You ARE a man of purpose. Furthermore, if you want a girl you need a job.
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